I FINALLY bought 'The Eraser' yesterday. And now, ten or so listens later, I'm completely hooked. I noticed a lot of the melodies are pretty similar to the things I write. Fast-paced, broken beats, keyboards, bass.

(Him because it's awesome, me because they're the only things at my disposal...)

And I've been writing a lot lately. I dunno why. I used to get such music block, but now all of a sudden I have one finished instrumental and a million riffs. And SOME lyrics, but not enough to fill up all the riffs. NEED MORE.

Thom Yorke is good music to sink into your own paranoia to. Which leads me to my next subject...

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I've had two very weird dreams the past two nights. I mean, mine are always like Saturday morning cartoons with crack, but these were actually DISTURBING. I usually don't read anything into dreams because mine are so improbable, but these HAVE to mean something.

In the first one, a married couple comes home and finds their daughter kind of...fallen apart on the living room floor. Like, limbs and everything just lying around in pieces, but with clean breaks, like she was made of plastic. And they're all distraught and trying to piece her back together and shit. And from my standpoint, I'm just yelling 'You idiot! She's dead!'

That one wasn't so weird. But the second one really scares me.

I'm watching a sort of time-lapse of a woman being eaten from the inside-out by some sort of disease. It infected from the bottom up, like blood poisoning...anyway, she's in the hospital, lying on a metal cart, hooked up to a little machine that basically replaced all her basic functions. And as parts of her become infected, the doctors just LOP THEM OFF! So I'll come back a day later and there'll be cross-sections of her legs on the table. But there was nothing really there...just a bit of bone surrounded by tons of skin. She had no hair, just boils. By the end, all that was left were hands and a head (somehow not connected), but she was happy, because it meant she could play her flute.

And that just floored me.
I've never woken up in a cold sweat before, but that finally got it out of me.

What the hell do you think this all means?

Joy in dying slowly, not accepting a quick end...

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School starts tomorrow.
I have an outfit all ready and stuff.
But I'm not looking forward to having to wake up early again.